Category Archives: SEX & LIFE

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SEX & LIFE

The Roadblocks In Your Mind: Getting Over Your Fear Of Driving

The Roadblocks In Your Mind: Getting Over Your Fear Of Driving

Pexels – CC0 Licence

It is essential now. Wherever you are, you’ve got to drive in order to get anywhere on time. And whether you’ve been driving for a while and your technique is a little rusty, or you haven’t been driving for a while, but now it has become a necessity, when there are certain anxieties associated with getting behind the wheel this can cloud our ability to drive but also put us off driving for life. When we have a fear of driving, it is not necessarily about one single component, but we’ve got to figure out the reasons why we have driving anxiety. So let’s provide you with a plan of action to get yourself on the road again.

The Reasons For A Fear Of Driving

To be fair, there is no one-size-fits-all reason why people develop a fear of driving. Some people have a fear of driving stem from a bad experience or a fear of accidents. Fear of accidents or “dystychiphobia†usually covers people who avoid every situation that increases their risk of physical danger. And while you may think about the fact that a car accident could cause scoliosis or could result in a life-threatening injury, there can be a combination of anxieties. Reasons people fear driving can be down to claustrophobia in the vehicle or performance anxiety. When you start to break down the reasons for your fear of driving, you can start to tackle these problems one by one.

Tackling The Symptoms

We have to remember that while we’ve got reasons why we’re scared of driving, they can manifest themselves in specific symptoms. It all depends on the person, but some can feel dizzy, short of breath, confused, or even have heart palpitations. While some people might not experience these types of symptoms, if you have any of these, it could be solved with medication or counseling to address an underlying issue. There are general tips that can help. For example, managing your stress is a simple way to reduce symptoms of anxiety. If you are someone who quickly gets anxious, getting behind the wheel of a car can be one of the most stressful situations.

Stress management encompasses so many different components, but there are specific techniques that can help people that have a fear of driving. For example, there are driver hypnosis courses that can help you to break down the mysticism of being behind the wheel. As well as this, there are desensitization techniques that involve putting yourself into situations that trigger anxiety symptoms. From the perspective of a driver, getting into a car with the engine running could be the first step. When we start to consider our symptomatic reactions, we can then begin to undertake the appropriate course of therapy. Using therapeutic techniques like desensitization can take a long time to go from one stage to the next, but you’ve got to remember that you are always progressing in the right direction.

What If It’s Impossible To Overcome?

We can pinpoint our problems to a handful of specific situations behind the wheel, and we may worry that we’ll never get over a fear of driving. We’ve got to remember that if it’s too much, we shouldn’t force it. When we cause unnecessary stress for ourselves, this results in a feeling of danger for the people in the vehicle and can cause dangers for other people on the road.

You have to remember that if confidence is the underlying issue, there are ways for you to help yourself back to driving with a more proactive mindset. Having a few lessons with an instructor, especially if you’ve not driven for years, can be the perfect way to bring back that muscle memory. Or if you’ve got a particular fear behind the wheel, for example, driving on the freeway, you need to build up your resilience. Going from driving to the end of your street and back is the first step, and gradually you can start to cover more distance. As soon as you begin to build up your confidence you could look at driving near the freeway and seeing what people do to get on it safely, but also there’s a lot to be said for looking at other idiots on the road. When we are so scared of driving, but some people are going from A to B without issue, it can fill us with a bit more confidence. 

We have to remember that it’s normal to feel some sense of driving anxiety, but it’s not something that should stay with us for life.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.

ORGANIC HEALTH & HOME, SEX & LIFE

Eight Ways To Preserve Your Precious Memories

Eight Ways To Preserve Your Precious Memories

It doesn’t matter where you go for vacations, trips or visits, you collect memories. Some people do it with badges, others with stickers and magnets. Your memories – whether from life or vacations – need to be preserved as best as possible. That box in the attic that has been filled to the brim with photographs? That box needs to come down, and the pictures treated accordingly – with reverence and care. Photos, videos and even magnet collections all have a place in life, and they should all be treated with respect.

Your collected memories show the world who you are. They tell your stories, and each photograph leads to the next and the next, a tattoo of happy memories etched in the boxes of the attic! You can use your pictures and videos to look back on life and appreciate the good times, smile at the loved ones left behind and remind yourself of every happy memory. After all, we take pictures to capture the good times. All you have left in life are captured happy moments, but if you don’t use guides like https://setapp.com/how-to/backup-iphone-to-external-drive, you’re not going to learn how to preserve them properly. You want to make sure that ALL of your good memories – from the camera roll to the iPhone – are well looked after. When you do, you’ll preserve your identity. Your whole life is left behind in photos and trinkets when you die, so you need to make sure you leave behind good memories.

So, with this in mind, let’s take a closer look at eight ways you can keep your memories safe.

Black Camera Film

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  • Preserve Home Movies First

Those dusty old reels that you have kept for years? They need to be looked after urgently. Home movies can deteriorate every day, and as they deteriorate, so do the colors on the reel. The good news is that there are services that can restore your home movies into a more updated setting. Digitizing old films allow you to put them into films that you can keep in photo albums or frames.

  • Keep Albums Together

Old photo albums shouldn’t be taken apart if you can help it. You may want to take the photos out and frame them, but if you take the photo albums apart, you’re going to lose the context of the pictures themselves. Take a muslin and wrap the album properly, and then store it in an acid-free box. It’s the best way to preserve the photo albums that you have and ensure that they are safe!

  • Always Backup Your Pics

We’ve discussed a guide to backing up your iPhone to an external drive, and it’s one of the most important things that you can do in the modern world of taking photos. By backing up your images on your phone, you can ensure that you always have access to them no matter what happens. 

  • Start Interviewing Everyone!

The older generations in your family aren’t going to be around forever. Get the younger relatives in the family to ask the older relatives questions that they want to know for the future. Ask about their parents, their adventures as children, and whether they had their hopes and dreams fulfilled. If you don’t get these questions on video for eternity, the stories will be lost, the memories forgotten. Don’t let this happen – get the interviews completed and then transcribed for later remembrance. 

  • Always Store Your Hard Copies Properly

Photos are still going to be best off the floor and away from damp and dark places. These memories are precious, and they deserve better treatment than being left all over the floor. The rooms in which you keep your photos are those that must be well ventilated, light and dry. Hard copies – once lost – are often irretrievable. Without the hard copies, you’re not going to be able to replace the memories you once had.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.

SEX & LIFE

Keeping An Even Keel During A Divorce

Keeping An Even Keel During A Divorce

The end of a marriage is an emotionally turbulent time, to say the very least. It can feel like your life is getting turned upside down and it can be hard to keep hold of yourself without stress tearing you in a bunch of different directions. However, it’s not impossible to get through it in one piece.

Pic Source – Pixabay License

Don’t sacrifice long-term happiness for short-term goals

If you’re feeling hurt during a divorce, it’s easy to want to hurt your ex-partner back. Sometimes, the ways that you hurt them might also hurt people close to you, such as your friends or children. You may force people to pick sides and end up jeopardizing your own relationships. Try to manage your priorities and think about where you’re going to be after the divorce, not just in the immediate future. The urge to seek revenge or some sort of compensation can be very strong, indeed, but you shouldn’t put it above your needs for a healthy and happy life past the divorce.

If you can, keep things civil

Emotions might be running high, but unless one partner is fully at fault for the divorce, such as in the result on infidelity, you should try to keep those emotions out of the actual legal process. For instance, instance of taking them to court, you could look for divorce mediation in your area. The urge to make things combative and to get yours might be strong, but you should take the time to think about what you want not just for yourself after the divorce, but what you really want for your ex-partner. Is hurting them more important than protecting everyone involved?

Handle your children with care

Arguing over the kids as a couple is going to strain everyone’s familial relationships. Unless your ex-partner is genuinely a threat to your children, you should hope that everyone has a better relationship after the divorce. As such, let a lawyer for child custody take care of the legal battle surrounding the children. Most importantly, try to explain to your children what is happening without trying to win them over to your side. Weaponizing your kids during a divorce is literally the worst thing you can do for your relationship and their emotional health.

Anticipate the worst

You’re going to be dealing with some ugly emotions and you might not only hate your ex-partner at times, you might find some self-hatred in there. Managing your divorce as best as possible can help you move on from those feelings, but you should also expect anger from your ex.If you’re not prepared for their own negative reactions, you can find yourself getting caught off guard and being dragged into an unhealthy back and forth. Knowing what to expect can help you simply abide it and keep working for a healthier conclusion.

It’s important to make sure you get legal help where you need, emotional support when you need, and to not mix up the divorce with your relationships with children and friends. Think not just about the divorce, but about what comes after, as well.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.

SEX & LIFE

My Take on How the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Reveals Why Divorce is so Prevalent Today (Spoilers Season 3)

My Take on How the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Reveals Why Divorce is so Prevalent Today (Spoilers Season 3)

Season 4 of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel has been confirmed! This however, is my personal take on Midge continuing to make poor decisions on her romantic life. *WARNING: There are spoilers of season 3 ahead.

https://pixabay.com/photos/vintage-1950s-pretty-woman-887272/

We all love Midge Maisel. She’s smart, pretty and witty as hell. However, no hat in the world can hide the fact that her love life is a mess. She’s got her choice in fine looking men, of course. But her decisions showcase what a lot of us do wrong today.

First, lets take a look at the ex-husband, Joel Maisel…

Joel is a hardworking man who steps up to take care of his kids. Kudos, Joel! There should be more of that in the world. But when we take a deeper look into Joel’s ability to love, that’s when things get little wonky. Joel was married to Midge, living the American Dream: A beautiful family, a fabulous apartment in the societies of NYC and he had an executive job. He also had a supporting wife, who not only encouraged him to proceed with his adoring hobby for comedy, but also provided briskets to make sure he got good time slots.

However, poor Joel is still missing something.

There’s a hole in him he can’t explain, so it must be Midget’s fault he doesn’t feel complete—We’ve all seen Jerry McGuire, right? So, like most humans, who are feeling worthless and choose to blame others for their lack of self-worth, Joel decides an affair with his secretary, Penny, will fill that void.

Spoiler alert, after leaving his family for Penny, Joel still has a hole and wants Midge back.

Joel is like so many people. He refuses to look inward to discover what’s really missing. So, until he does that, Joel will continue to be the guy who is always missing the ‘one who got away’. Don’t believe what I’m saying? Look at my quick cliff notes of Season 3…

  • Joel has a box of unclaimed lipstick next to his bed.
  • He pines over missing Midge, even when he meets Mei.
  • Joel starts dating Mei, but flies off to Vegas to be with his ‘true love’, Midge.
  • Joel marries Midge again while dating Mei. The next morning, he tells Midge they’re going to have to get a divorce because he’s got a girlfriend.
  • Goes home, he and Mei break up, to where he is now free to be with his ‘wife’, his true love, Midge. But instead, he tells Midge he and the kids can’t come to Miami for the weekend. Then, Joel proceeds to walk downstairs into the underground casino and give an awkward confession on how much he cares about Mei.

Yes, just like Susie said to Joel in Season 3, Joel will always love Midge and will want to make sure she is taken care of. That is undoubtedly true. He wants to make sure she and his kids don’t struggle in life. But by the end of the season, Joel is practically cheating on both Midge and Mei, if we’re getting technical.

Moral: It’s not you; it’s Joel.

If I had a PhD, I could totally get away with blaming his behavior on something that happened to him as a child. I could hold accountable Joel’s mother, Shirley, and her erratic behavior or negligent trust issues, but since I’m not, I’ll just leave diagnosis to the professionals. Here’s what we do know, Midge is Joel’s forever ‘one that got away’, but until he can love himself, he has no business trying to be in a committed relationship.

Next, we will take a look at Lenny Bruce…

The sexual tension is high when it comes to Midge and that man. We’ve all been there. That’s why we all love Lenny so much. A sexy bad-boy type that draws you in and can make chemical reactions happen within your body. What’s completely unique and unusual about this type of guy is the fact that they can look unkept, un-showered and underachieving and still have this magnetic pull on you, …and half the population.

1. They have the talent to be abrasive, without being too cold.

2. They have enough sense to make you feel wanted for the night, but don’t get any other ideas, please.  

3. They have perfected ‘love’em and leave’.

But every once in a blue moon… these primal creatures of habit, fall in love. Hence, Lenny Bruce appears to have fallen head over heels for our dear, Midge. And why shouldn’t he? She bailed him out of jail. She held his hand, twice, when he was filming those TV shows. Midge makes Lenny a better person. But I ask this question… what does Lenny do for Midge?

After seeing the responses trend on Twitter for Midge and Lenny to become the ‘it’ couple, I realized, so many hopeless romantics still believe they can be ‘the one to change him’. Or in this case, Midge can change Lenny.

Spoiler Alert: She can’t change him.

Only Lenny can change himself. Lenny is an inspiration to Midge in the sense of comedy. But here’s the hard truth… That’s probably it. What else can Lenny offer Midge but a good time and heartbreak? I may be speculating, but Lenny, also like Joel, is missing self-worth. He drinks like a fish, enjoys getting arrested and has no intentions of the white picket fence lifestyle. Plus, he hasn’t given Midge any other reasons to question that.

The moral: Lenny is a great guy; people like this usually are.

But it’s important for Midge to know herself. She likes expensive things and needs to be kept in a certain lifestyle. Expecting Lenny to be willing and able to keep up with her and her expectations is probably unfair of her. Lenny’s a one-of-a-kind, friend. He’s the type of guy that you will love completely from a distance, and perhaps, in a parallel universe, you could have possibly been together.

But if you look at it face value, it’s probably better to love from afar than to hate up close. Opposites do attract, but too opposite can cause division. I love Lenny. I know a handful of Lenny’s. But I will love them from where I stand because I know myself and know, maybe from experience, that I’m not the one who’s going to be able to change them.

And finally, Benjamin…

Every mother’s favorite man for their daughter to be with. But like most daughters, Midge doesn’t want him. Why? He’s good-looking, has no money issues and has a really great job. Well, this is where I suggest Midge needs to take a look at herself—Not because Benjamin looks good on paper, or because her parents liked him, but because she did.

And let’s not forget, Benjamin supported Midge with her career. He believes she’s amazing at what she does. He thinks she’s the funniest woman on earth. Besides Susie, Benjamin was one of her biggest fans. He didn’t mind being material for her comedy. But instead of talking to him about her worries of future resentment, Midge leaves him without the courtesy of a face to face conversation—Bad job, Midge.

As humans, things that are good for us, scare the living crap out of us. People are always waiting for the other shoe to drop. What if you found out, there is no shoe?

Spoiler alert: You’ve been worried about things, this whole time, and there was never a shoe that could possibly drop to begin with.

Moral: Someone recently tweeted, ‘Benjamin deserves better’.

Yes, we all deserve better than what we’ve been aiming for when it comes to matters of the heart. Whether you’ve been married to your partner for decades or you’re still swiping to find your soulmate, this pertains to all of us. Like Benjamin, we deserve that person who will have the conversations with us, instead of predicting they already know how the conversation will go. We also deserve to be thatperson for someone else, as well—Some of us forget to look in the mirror sometimes when picking out other’s faults.

The lifelong question of ‘Does life imitate art or does art imitate life’

This question swirls in everyone’s mind, from time to time. But these hidden, or not so hidden, love-life issues showcased in the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel hit very close to the real factors that cause an increased number of divorces today. It’s not about her own personal women’s movement, or the climb to success and having to choose one thing or another… It’s about knowing who you are, having self-worth, having self-love, giving love, receiving love and communication.

Sure. It’s all very hard to do at first. If it were easy, everyone would be doing it. And there would be no one with these impossible love-life issues. The only thing we can do as humans is keep trying to better ourselvesevery day. Practice makes perfect. So, why not? Go buy a hat or invest in some drop-less shoes. But while you’re doing that, take a look inside yourself and see what needs your attention. You can certainly do that while you wait for the next season of Mrs. Maisel.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.

SEX & LIFE

Have You Ever Heard Of A Lemon Law?

Have You Ever Heard Of A Lemon Law?

Image Credit: Pexels, Free to Use Licence. 

Every once in awhile whilst scrolling the internet you’ll come across something you’ve never heard of before but that could serve you well and save you money later down the line – The Lemon Law, may very well be one of those occasions.

What is the Lemon Law?

Believe it or not, the Lemon Law has nothing to do with the sour citrus fruit with which it shares its name and instead is a law designed to protect a car owner whose car is considered a ‘lemon’.  We realize that is still a little confusing, so let’s clear things up a bit. When buying a car you expect it to be free from issues or faults but sadly this is not always the case. Generally, a car is referred to as a ‘lemon’ if it is still under warranty but has dangerous issues that aren’t able to be repaired. The Lemon Law, therefore, was designed to protect a car owner whose car is a lemon from falling into an endless cycle of faults and repairs, and when proved to be a lemon ensures that the car’s owner is suitably compensated with a new vehicle or cash to the value. 

Where is the Lemon Law active?

The Federal Government and each individual US state each have Lemon Laws to protect their inhabitants and the precise details of these laws do vary. In general, California is considered to have one of the toughest Lemon Laws that ensures the best result for the consumer and is referred to formally as The Song-Beverly Consumer Warranty Act. The Song-Beverly Consumer Warranty act applies not only to cars but to all consumer goods under warranty, and so it’s not just cars that can be classed as a lemon.  

Is your car eligible? 

In California, your car will be covered under the Lemon Law so long as it is under warranty, and so this doesn’t mean that it needs to be brand new. There are a number of different warranties that could apply to your vehicle including the manufacturer’s warranty, a powertrain warranty, the dealer’s written warranty or a CPO (Certified pre-owned). Where you purchased your car may also not matter as you could still be able to claim under the Federal Lemon Law. 

What should you do if you think your car is a lemon?

You can file a claim for the Lemon Law yourself but as with any legal matter, it is always best to contact an attorney.  A Lemon Law Lawyer will know the law in and out be able to advise you on how best to make your claim to ensure that you get the maximum amount of compensation owed to you. A Lemon Law Lawyer will also be able to defend you against the manufacturer or car salesperson who will naturally want to fight the Lemon Law to save themselves some money. What’s even better is that when hiring a Lemon Lawyer you needn’t pay a thing! If successful the car manufacturer will pay your legal fees leaving you with the full amount of compensation owed to you.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.