The Five Crucial Stages Of A Romantic Relationship, And How To Know You Are Ready For Them
Romantic relationships are amazing and stressful. But wonderful, yet can be confusing. In fact, they can have you thinking that up is down and chasing around in circles. But romantic relationships don’t have to be so confusing. Especially if you use the guide below to work out which stage you are at, and whether you are ready to move on to the next one. Then you will be able to move forward with confidence and truly enjoy your life as part of a couple.
You are ready to date
How do you know when you are ready to date someone? Well, most people think it’s when they are lonely. But this isn’t actually the best reason to start a relationship. In fact, a lot of advice now, is that you have to learn who you are first. Before getting tied down with someone else.
This is because if you get into a relationship too early is easy to start to take on some of the other person’s personality before yours is fully formed. In fact, this can happen at any age if you haven’t first taken the time to get to know yourself and what you want out of life.
But what does getting to know yourself look like? Well, it can be anything from exploring the things that you are interested in. Such as art, literature, exercise or any other hobbies. Or it can involve traveling the world and have new experiences on you own. Which is not only tons of fun but will show you that you can cope when thing get tough, without being codependent on another person. Or if could be that you give yourself some time to pursue your career goals. So you can dedicate your focus and energy to that and having some fun, before you decide to settle down.
Most importantly getting to know yourself is about not letting being single define you, and learning to deal with emotions of aloneness is a constructive way. By doing this, you know that any relationship you do decide to get into will be for the right reason. That is that you have a true connection with that person, rather than the fact that you feel uncomfortable being on your own.
You are ready to ‘go steady.’
OK, so this isn’t the 1950’s! So maybe ‘going steady’ isn’t the best term to use. But you know what I mean! I mean dating someone exclusively, making a commitment to them as your significant other, and working towards bringing your lives together as a couple.
But how can you tell that you are ready for this stage of your relationship? Well, despite the lovely notion of a whirlwind romance, for most folks it takes a little time to know if you want to invest your emotion in another person or not. Yes, it’s easy to mistake the first flushes of a relationship for something more lasting. But in reality it’s best to wait for a little and see how things work out in the longer term.
That is partly because it takes a while for you to really get to know the other person and what make them tick. As well as how this fits in with you and your goals in life.
Generally, you know that you are ready to go steady in a relationship if other potential suitors start to lose their appeal. Maybe you are thinking about the person all of the time? Or perhaps you have started imagining what your future together would look like? If this is the case, then it’s probably a good idea to have the exclusivity talk and make it official.
You are ready to move in
Now, back in the old days, it used to be that folks would date for a while and then get married. But that isn’t always the case now. For a lot of people, there is a stage in between where they cohabit or move in together.
But how do you know that you are ready for this momentous step? Well, if you are spending an inordinate amount of time looking at houses for rent online and in the paper, that might be your first clue. You are obviously thinking about how it would be to further integrate your lives.
Or it might be that you are sick and tired of living out of a suitcase. As you and your other half spend so much time together, one or other of you is always at the others place.
But moving in together is a big decision and shouldn’t just be based on convenience. You have to think about the longer term effect that it could have on you as a couple as well.
For instance, it can be a lot harder to break up if you live together. As you not only have to stop seeing that person, but you have to deal with the financial and material issues of splitting one household back into two.
You are ready to get engaged
So some people might take this step without living together first, perhaps for religious reasons? While others will do this after they have lived together for a while. But how do you know that it is the right time to pop the question, or say yes when it’s asked?
Well, first of all, if you are dreaming of diamond rings, and your other half getting down on one knee, you need to come back to reality, first. Yes, it’s super fun getting engaged and celebrating your love and commitment with your friends and family.
But getting engaged is a promise to marry, and spend the rest of your life with that person. If you can’t see that happening, then it might be better to not take this step in the first place.
Secondly, your decision needs to be based on the amount of emotional intimacy that you share as a couple. With the general idea being that you see each other as soul mates. Meaning that you feel that this person gets you in a way that no one else has, and that you have an unshakable connection and respect for one another.
If you worry that you will break up every time you have an argument, then maybe you are not quite at the getting engaged stage. As you need to be able to weather the bad times as well as the good times to make it succeed.
Having said that, it is unlikely that you won’t have any doubts as to whether you are doing the right. In fact, it would be worrisome if you didn’t, as then you obviously weren’t thinking about things deeply enough. Which you should be doing when making a true, life long commitment.
In fact, that is why having the time of being engaged before you actually get married is so useful. This is because it allows you to work out any remaining issues in the relationship, while you prepare for the wedding.
You are ready to get married
It’s funny, but if you are an anxious person, you can know down deep inside that you are ready to get married. But still, worry from time to time in the lead up to the wedding whether you are doing the right thing.
But sometimes instead of looking for a huge thunderbolt moment, it’s the little things that can convince you that you have made the right choice for your life partner. For example, if you are calmer when you are with them than when you aren’t, it’s a good sign.
Or the small fact that they take the time and effort every day to make you smile can help reassure you that you have truly found the one you are meant to marry.
Tia, and TipsfromTia.com is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram