Tag Archives: don’ts for marriage

You’re At A Crossroads: Which Way Should You Go? Tips For Couples Going Through Tough Times

You’re At A Crossroads: Which Way Should You Go? Tips For Couples Going Through Tough Times

It’s normal for couples to hit bumps in the road from time to time. No couple in the world has a perfect relationship. Even people who seem like they’re madly in love might have days when they argue like cat and dog. Sometimes, you come to point when you have to make a decision. If things haven’t been right for a while, or something has happened that has changed the dynamics of the relationship, you have to decide whether to try and find solutions for problems, or go your separate ways. If you’re going through a tough time, these tips may come in handy.

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Identify the problems and talk about them

Have you been arguing for a while or do you not spend much time together anymore? Try and work out why things have changed or what has happened to make you feel uncomfortable. If you can identify the problems, it’s much easier to find solutions. Do you need to make an effort to spend more time together? Has one of you been neglecting the other or have you fallen down each other’s list of priorities? Have you been seeing somebody else or have you been thinking about what it would be like to be single again? If you’ve got things on your mind, be honest, and talk to your partner. It’s best that they know what’s going through your head.

Make time to chat about how you feel. Don’t just mention something in passing, and then go about your daily business. It’s important to communicate properly. You may find that talking and being frank gives you more clarity. Perhaps, you can work things out or maybe you might decide that there’s no way forward.

Seeking help

Relationship troubles aren’t always caused by problems between two people. Often, issues that affect one person have a knock-on effect. You may find that your partner can’t give their all to you if they’ve lost their job or they’re suffering from an illness, for example. If you’re dealing with external issues, don’t be afraid to seek help. Healing yourself can often have benefits for your relationship.

If you’re having troubles in your relationship, it may also be worth seeing a therapist with expertise in helping couples. If you’re keen to find out more about couple’s therapy, you’ll find pages like https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201203/5-principles-effective-couples-therapy helpful.

Being realistic

Sometimes, in life, it’s beneficial to admit that things aren’t working and to adopt a pragmatic approach. Splitting up may be a horrible prospect, but if you’ve tried everything, it may be the best thing to do. If you’re married, it’s wise to be prepared for difficult times ahead. It’s not as easy as going in different directions and not seeing each other. A divorce has repercussions for both parties, and you should seek expert help from a firm such as https://www.millerbowleslaw.com/. You may not want to think about the practicalities because it makes it seem very real. But the sooner you get your head around the processes and what’s going to happen, the better.

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Relationships are hard work. You have to compromise, and sometimes, you have to make sacrifices. Often, making changes and being open and honest can work. But sometimes, there’s no way forward. If you’re at a crossroads, hopefully, this guide will help you to make a decision.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.

Common Problems in Marriage and How You Can Deal With Them

Common Problems in Marriage and How You Can Deal With Them

It is very rare that any couple doesn’t run into some problems at some point in their relationship. It is natural that there are some disagreements on things or one person putting in a little more in the relationship at times than the other. But if you know yourself and each other well, and you can identify the problems quickly, then the chances of you dealing with them promptly is much higher.

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A lot of the time people say that marriage needs to be 100% and 100%. But there are times when one person will only be giving 80%. There might be health issues or struggles at work. The key thing for the person still giving 100% is to not get bitter or resentful about it. There are times and seasons when it comes to relationships. If you can’t help each other, then it could be time to call a divorce lawyer. But if you want to work through it, then there are options for you. Here are some things to consider.

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Improve Communication

A lot of problems in a marriage can come from poor communication. It might be from exhaustion that when you come home from work you don’t communicate well. You might take your day out on your spouse or even keep things from them when you are feeling resentful towards them. It is also important to communicate properly without one of you scrolling on your phone, for example. If you want to improve the communication, then how about doing so in a public place. You are much more likely to sort something out in public, without raising your voices. You could also have an agreement that you have a set time for talking. You can just carried away in the busyness of everyday life otherwise.

Intimacy

A lot of problems in a relationship can come down to intimacy. You might both have separate expectations so can get frustrated when it doesn’t happen. Some of this can come down to communication. You need to be able to feel comfortable to talk to each other about this kind of thing. But one thing that you can do is make plans. To start with it might not seem very romantic. But if you agree on days of the week that you will be intimate, you can both plan for it. There can be no excuses of just wanted to go to sleep as it was an agreement that you have had. You just need to be open and honest with each other.

Money

Money can be a big problem in marriages. It can be escalated when one partner isn’t working due to raising children, for example. So one of the best things to do is to have joint accounts. If the finances are shared and open, then it makes it easier to talk about budget and overspending. It all boils down to communication really, though. You need to talk to each other about what you expect money to be spent on and what you expect money to be saved on.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.

Avoid Heading For Divorce By Doing These Simple Things

Avoid Heading For Divorce By Doing These Simple Things

No one ever said that relationships are super easy and to be honest, why would they be? You are essentially attempting to spend the rest of your life with the very same person and whilst doing so you’re both still constantly changing and evolving as people. The hope though is that you’ll be changing together rather than growing apart.

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Realising you’ve met the one is one of the most breathtaking moments you’ll ever experience. They always say that when you know, you know, but that doesn’t mean that relationships and marriage are all plain sailing either. Things can slowly crop up and turn into huge issues if they aren’t addressed properly. Unfortunately that means that far too many great couples end up splitting up and heading for divorce instead of overcoming the obstacles they’ve been presented with. It doesn’t have to be that way though and if you follow these steps, you’ll probably never find yourself filling out divorce papers as you’ll still be with the very same person you fell so in love with originally…

  1. Be the person your spouse fell in love with

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Of course we all change over the years and that’s part and parcel of choosing to spend your life with someone. No one is ever the same throughout their entire adult life and why would you want to be? Where’s the excitement in that? But whilst your partner is prepared to stand by you as you change and hopefully grow into an even better person, that doesn’t mean that you can completely dessert the person you were in the beginning. It was the qualities you had then that made your spouse fall in love with you and want to commit to spending their entire life with you, so make sure you’re not leaving everything you once were behind in search of someone you want to become.

  1. Identify any problems and change them

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Marriage certainly isn’t a smooth ride at all times and there will be problems along the way. That part is guaranteed. But it’s how you deal with these problems that make all the difference. If you and partner fall out over the same thing time and time again then it means you’re making the huge mistake of not addressing it to begin with. Eventually the problem will spiral out of control and that could mean divorce if you don’t actively try to sort it. If you and your spouse are unable to identify what the exact issue is or how to overcome it, symmetry counseling is a great way to talk through issues without the entire situation escalating.

  1. Be the best version of yourself

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There’s nothing more attractive than self confidence and being happy with the person you are. How can you expect others to love you if you don’t even love yourself? If you demonstrate to your partner that you’re completely comfortable with who you are and give the impression that you’re still as awesome now as you always were, they’ll likely follow trend and see exactly what you do too.

That means feeling and looking your best. If you’re down about your weight then take steps to change it. If you hate your frumpy wardrobe then go out and re-haul your look. Fall in love with yourself again so that your spouse gets the excitement of doing it all again as well.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.

Devastating Mistakes Made By Newlyweds In Their First Year Of Marriage

Devastating Mistakes Made By Newlyweds In Their First Year Of Marriage

We all know that marriage is a difficult thing to get right. According to the data from the US, about half of all marriages will eventually end in failure. And that’s just the headline statistics. There are millions more marriages held together at the seams by the duty to children and for financial benefit. How many happy marriages are actually out there? Some have estimated that the figure is as low as ten percent.

The reality of marriage is shocking. But a lot of the problems that blight the institution can be traced back to those first few months as a married couple. Couples who make mistakes early on can find it difficult to fix them later. Here we’re going to look at some of the issues that married couples have in their first year and what to do about them.

Making Mistakes When Buying A New Home

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As a couple, you need a joint plan to get yourselves on the housing ladder. Going it alone or having secret saving accounts won’t work. Both of you need to be open and honest about the amount you can earn and the amount you can save after bills.

Once you make the decision to buy, it’s also important that you choose real estate agents with clout. Different agencies have different capacities. Some use data in an intelligent way to find you a home that actually meets your needs. Others take a back seat and let you make a decision that could cost you in the long run. Since you’ll be paying for your home for 25 years or more, it’s essential you make the right decisions as a couple early on.

Giving In To The Pressure To Have A Baby

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Parents, and family in general can pressure you to have a baby early on in your marriage. You can’t leave it until later you’re repeatedly told. The problem for many couples with having a baby early is that they don’t get time to mature together as a couple. Parents need a sort of honeymoon period once they’re married to explore their relationship and get used to married life. Having a child can disrupt that process. What’s more, according to parents, having children is their greatest regret when they look back at their marriages. So it’s of vital importance that parents only have kids at the right time. When it comes to children, it’s worth waiting.

Spending More Than You’re Saving

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Besides kids, finances are the biggest cause of arguments between parents. At the start of a marriage, money is tight. You’ve just blown thousands of dollars on a wedding. And by the time you get off honeymoon, you’ve barely got the money to pay the rent. This is the point at which newlyweds can get into trouble. If something comes up, like a vet bill, many newlyweds find themselves unable to pay for it. This then creates additional stress that can wreak havoc on your relationship. A good rule of thumb, therefore, is to save, save, save. Skimp on the wedding if you have to.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.