Tag Archives: broken marriage and your health

Avoid Heading For Divorce By Doing These Simple Things

Avoid Heading For Divorce By Doing These Simple Things

No one ever said that relationships are super easy and to be honest, why would they be? You are essentially attempting to spend the rest of your life with the very same person and whilst doing so you’re both still constantly changing and evolving as people. The hope though is that you’ll be changing together rather than growing apart.

pexels-photo2Image by Pexels

Realising you’ve met the one is one of the most breathtaking moments you’ll ever experience. They always say that when you know, you know, but that doesn’t mean that relationships and marriage are all plain sailing either. Things can slowly crop up and turn into huge issues if they aren’t addressed properly. Unfortunately that means that far too many great couples end up splitting up and heading for divorce instead of overcoming the obstacles they’ve been presented with. It doesn’t have to be that way though and if you follow these steps, you’ll probably never find yourself filling out divorce papers as you’ll still be with the very same person you fell so in love with originally…

  1. Be the person your spouse fell in love with

pexels-photo-103127Image by Pexels

Of course we all change over the years and that’s part and parcel of choosing to spend your life with someone. No one is ever the same throughout their entire adult life and why would you want to be? Where’s the excitement in that? But whilst your partner is prepared to stand by you as you change and hopefully grow into an even better person, that doesn’t mean that you can completely dessert the person you were in the beginning. It was the qualities you had then that made your spouse fall in love with you and want to commit to spending their entire life with you, so make sure you’re not leaving everything you once were behind in search of someone you want to become.

  1. Identify any problems and change them

heartsickness-lover-s-grief-lovesickness-coupe-50592Image by Pexels

Marriage certainly isn’t a smooth ride at all times and there will be problems along the way. That part is guaranteed. But it’s how you deal with these problems that make all the difference. If you and partner fall out over the same thing time and time again then it means you’re making the huge mistake of not addressing it to begin with. Eventually the problem will spiral out of control and that could mean divorce if you don’t actively try to sort it. If you and your spouse are unable to identify what the exact issue is or how to overcome it, symmetry counseling is a great way to talk through issues without the entire situation escalating.

  1. Be the best version of yourself

pexels-photo-235052Image by Pexels

There’s nothing more attractive than self confidence and being happy with the person you are. How can you expect others to love you if you don’t even love yourself? If you demonstrate to your partner that you’re completely comfortable with who you are and give the impression that you’re still as awesome now as you always were, they’ll likely follow trend and see exactly what you do too.

That means feeling and looking your best. If you’re down about your weight then take steps to change it. If you hate your frumpy wardrobe then go out and re-haul your look. Fall in love with yourself again so that your spouse gets the excitement of doing it all again as well.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.

Emotional Devastation: Understanding the Mental Effects of Divorce

Emotional Devastation: Understanding the Mental Effects of Divorce

divorce-908743_960_720

Pixabay

I’m going to go ahead and guess that no-one reading this article believes divorce is easy. But when we consider the precise emotional impacts of divorce, it can look even scarier than you thought. Here are the common emotional effects, along with some tips for dealing with them.

Depression

It’s fair to say that this one will come as no surprise to most people reading this article. A divorce, essentially, signals the death of a loving relationship. And such a thing can often induce deep feelings of grief. Some may feel that the word “grief” carries with it a sense of overstatement. But anyone who has seen the end of a meaningful relationship will likely understand what I’m saying. Feelings of unworthiness, sadness, and difficulty concentrating are common during a divorce. Do not underestimate depression, even if it’s only short-term. Consider speaking to a professional.

depression-1252577_960_720Pixabay

Guilt

A sense of failure often comes with a divorce. It’s much stronger than the kind of guilt people tend to feel at the end up an unmarried relationship. This is because marriage is made out to be this monolithic thing that people have to work hard to maintain the health of. This is true to an extent, but only because society and the law make it out to be so. The end of a marriage shouldn’t be approached with any more guilt than the end of a regular relationship.

Anger

Anger can often occur if there are disputes at the heart of a divorce. This can be a dispute over assets, as it so often is. It could be a dispute over the custody of children. Much of the time, resolving these disputes require a calm head and rational thinking.

Angry twenty something couple yelling at each other
Angry twenty something couple yelling at each other

Flickr

It’s unlikely that this is something that either party will be capable of! That’s why it’s so vital to have a family lawyer involved to try to figure things out. (That and the fact that there’s a lot of legal complexity here!) Family lawyers like Manassa, Stassen & Vaclavek, P.C. are vital to this process. Ultimately, this can help reduce anger by aiding with reasonable solutions.

Fear

What will the future hold? What sort of relationship are the two of you going to have from here on out? Will you ever see the much-liked family of your ex-partner again? What will life with the kids be like now? How are our mutual friends going to react and conduct themselves going forward? There’s a lot of uncertainty in the future when a divorce occurs. This, of course, can trigger a lot of fear. Try looking into ways of dealing with this uncertainty. 5348057660_5210940458_b

Flickr

Stress

All of the above are going to contribute to feelings of stress. This can often reach levels of intensity such as you have never before experienced. You may already know that stress is an extremely unhealthy part of your life. But people usually think about long-term stress when they think about such health effects. It’s important to understand that intense short-term stress can also present several health dangers. Do your best to tackle it. Reducing stress can help you deal with the above emotions. Remember that these emotions tend to exacerbate themselves. It can be a vicious circle, but it might be one you can break.

Tia, and TipsfromTia.com  is trying to keep you looking good and
feeling good, from the inside out. If you’ve got a problem or a tip email me! Be sure to Like and share on Facebook or Follow on Twitter or Instagram.